My Life As A Teenage Robot Porn Story: Diamonds Are a Robots Best Friend – Chapter 9

Diamonds Are a
Robots Best Friend

A My Life as a
Teenage Robot Fanfic

Chapter Nine A
Simple Matter of Efficiency

Even though the inside of Maximillian Marquis personal
helicopter was luxurious, Brad felt cramped sitting next to Rojacks massive frame.P The silent giant kept one eye on him, with
one robotic hand wrapped around his arm.P
If the idea was to intimidate him, it was working.P He glanced out the window and into the
night, trying to keep track of which direction theyd been flying for the past
half hour but he couldnt see much in the way of scenery below them.

Marquis was sitting opposite him, between Jenny and Ruby
LaRose.P He glanced out the window as
well, chuckling.P A beautiful moon
tonight, is it not?P So full, and round,
like a delicious piece of fruit waiting to be picked.P I would suggest that you sit back, relax,
and enjoy your flight, young man.

Brad tugged at his collar he was still dressed in a full
tuxedo and looked at Jenny.P She still
sparkled in her diamond-paint, but there was no emotion in her face.P Jenny Jen cmon, its me, its
Brad.P Wake up!

She is very much awake, smiled Marquis, and ready to do
exactly as she is told.P Arent you,
XJ-9?

Awaiting instructions, sir, Jenny droned, staring straight
ahead.

What do you want with Jenny, anyway? growled Brad.P He nodded towards Rojack.P Youve already got this big goon to run
your errands for you.P Or maybe youre
looking to replace him!P A-ha!P Thats it!P
Youre replacing him because he tried to steal those moon diamonds from
you a few days ago!

Marquis had to laugh out loud at that.P Rojack is my most loyal and trusted
robot.P He did exactly as I
instructed him to do.

I knew it!P I knew
it! Brad grinned, pointing at Jenny.P
Told ya!P I told you he was an
evil mastermind!P What do you think of
my goofy stories now, Jen?P He stole his
own diamonds to er uh, why did you steal your own diamonds?

For the benefit of our mutual friend Jennifer, of course,
Marquis said, with his rich, rolling accent.P
The whole robbery was staged so that she would rescue my diamonds, and
give me an excuse to thank her and offer her a position working as a model at
my diamond show.P He laughed.P It was not very difficult to get her to say
yes.P She was so very
ready to have flowers thrown at her feet.

Marquis placed a hand on Jennys shoulder.P You see, I needed her.P The XJ-9 is perhaps the most advanced
robot ever constructed.P Only she was
powerful and accurate enough to carve my Jovian diamonds, and only she could
have created my perfectly flat quartz mirrors.P
And she still has one more very, very important task to complete
before the night is over.

With that, Marquis leaned back and relaxed.P Brad felt vindicated, yet at the same time,
he felt bad for Jenny.P Does she know
that shes being used?P He wondered
if he saw a twinge of pain in her eyes.P
Brad racked his brain, trying to put all the pieces together in his mind

He frowned at Ruby, who was busy scratching down
calculations on a clipboard. PHis ego
was still a little sore from being tricked then he remembered something;
something hed heard in Marquis workshop last night.P No anomalies in the beam at all.P Boss, this thing is going to have twice the power you need to get
the job done.P Ruby had told him
about drilling mines on the moon

Jovian diamonds like the diamonds that you use in those
big drilling lasers on the moon?P So
you could use them to make a humungous laser beam.P Right?

Marquis broke out in a smile.P Very good, Bradley!P I am
most impressed!P Only, I have not
built one humungous laser beam.P
I have built six of them.P
He leaned forward, enjoying the expression of awe on Brads face.P You see, Jovian diamonds can generate
immensely powerful lasers.P But they are
very scarce, and almost impossible to cut properly.P The diamonds in my drilling lasers on the moon might be, perhaps,
the size of my thumbnail.P Youve seen
the size of the diamonds I am using tonight.P
All cut to perfect precision by this remarkable young robot!

And the mirrors?P
Umm mirrors reflect lasers, right?P
I saw Jenny do that once.P Of
course, that was before she took a job working for an evil mastermind!P Brad shot an I told you so look at
her.

Jenny stared straight ahead, without a trace of reaction.

Why, youve hurt my feelings, Marquis chuckled.P The beams are so powerful that I need
perfect quartz mirrors to steer them, to point them to focus them,
onto a single point.P That requires a
great deal of precision.P And that is
where the XJ-9 comes in.

Brad took a deep breath, trying to calm himself.P Man, if a little diamond can make a hole
hundreds of miles deep how far can you go with one of those giant diamonds?

Marquis mouth spread into a thin smile.P All the way through.

Wha what do you mean? stammered Brad.

Marquis gestured to Ruby with a nod.P Miss LaRose has recently made a major
discovery in her geology studies on the moon.P
There is a vast deposit of diamonds, very deep underground, where the
pressure is extremely high.P The entire
core of the moon is surrounded by a shell of diamonds, some the size of houses.P Unimaginable riches but unfortunately, no
human or robot could ever reach those depths.

Right, said Brad, because of the lava.P I saw that in a movie once!P Uh, I think there are giant moon spiders
underground too.P Oh yeah, the moon
spiders would eat the miners.P Probably
wouldnt touch the robots, though

Marquis sighed, and rolled his eyes.P Amazingly, moon spiders are not the
problem.P No, unlike the Earth, the
interior of the moon is solid, not liquid.P
But any tunnel a thousand miles deep would collapse on itself.P Any tunneling machine would be crushed by
the pressure at such depths.P A
limitless supply of diamonds, so close, yet out of reach.P But the answer is so very simple, you see.

He leaned forward on his walking-stick.P Tell me, Bradley, how would you extract the
seed from the center of a fresh peach?P
Would you poke holes in the peach, and chip away at the seed?

Pffft no, replied Brad, youd just slice it
open.

His jaw dropped as the words came out of his mouth.P You have got to be yanking me.

I am most certainly not.P
It is a simple matter of efficiency, explained Marquis,
matter-of-factly.P Instead of drilling
expensive, and dangerous, tunnels we simply remove the outer layers of the
moon, exposing the inner core.P Then the
diamonds may be harvested by conventional means.

Brad looked around, horrified, at the quiet smiles on
everyones faces.P Okay, okay, am I the
only person here who thinks that slicing the moon in half is a BAD IDEA?!?P Doesnt it control the tides and junk like
that?P If you destroy the moon, wont
that make, like, earthquakes and tidal waves?

Lets just say that after tonight, I plan on taking a nice
vacation at my private ranch in Montana.P
A nice, safe distance from any oceans or fault lines.P Marquis stroked the diamond capstone of his
walking-stick and smiled out the window, at the fat moon hanging in the night
sky.P Take a good look, my young friend
this is the last night that anyone on Earth shall ever see it in one piece.

The sleek, black-and-silver helicopter approached the
abandoned mine, far removed from any city or town.P It was just a large tunnel cut into the sheer face of a small
rocky cliff, surrounded by thinning forest and patches of brown shrubs.P The lights below were the only sign of
civilization as far as the eye could see.P
But there was plenty of activity.

Large trucks were parked just in front of the tunnel, with
dozens of workers unloading supplies, driving them into the tunnel with
forklifts.P A row of tanker trucks sat
opposite them, feeding hoses into a bank of nozzles on the ground, with white
wisps of vapor drifting into the sky.P
More workers cleared a flat patch of ground and illuminated a set of
bright landing lights.P The helicopter
slowed, circled once, and gently settled down on its landing gear as its rotors
whipped up clouds up dust.

An attendant rushed up to open the door, and Marquis climbed
out, followed by Jenny and Ruby, and Rojack, clutching Brad firmly by both
shoulders.P An electric cart sped up to
the helicopter.P Marquis and his
guests took a seat, and he motioned for the driver to head into the
mineshaft.

The cart rolled its way through the commotion and towards
the tunnel, as the helicopters engines whined down, the rotors slowing to a
halt.P Nobody noticed a small access
door on the helicopters side start to jiggle.P
It swung open, and the cover of the fuel tank popped off.P Then a stream of silver-green ooze flowed
out of the mouth of the tank, and started to form a shiny metallic puddle on
the ground.

Brad grew more uneasy as the cart bumped along, deeper into
the rocky tunnel.P Workers were running
in both directions, and a forklift sped past, carrying empty crates back to the
outside.P In the dim lighting of the
overhead lamps, Brad could just barely make out a logo on the side of the
forklift.P It was the familiar
black-and-silver double-M of Marquis Industries, with the words Marquis Aerospace
written below it.

Marquis noticed a look of confusion on Brads face.P Oh, come now!P You were doing so well.P
You guessed, correctly, that I have constructed a very power laser.P And now you know that I intend to use it to
dissect the moon.P So, obviously I
need a way to get my laser to the moon.

The cart stopped briefly in front of a massive door, covered
with black and yellow stripes.P The
workers and guards nodded respectfully when they saw Marquis riding up
front.P With a loud clank and a hiss,
the door split down the middle, and both halves slid into the rock.P The cart rolled forward into a brightly lit
room

No, it was a cavern.P
It was immense.P It could have
held a football field, and it stretched hundreds of feet into the air.P Scaffolding and towers lined the exposed
rock, and rows of windows revealed teams of scientists and engineers, working
with powerful computers.P Dozens of
technicians and hundreds of robots were securing equipment and tending to
machinery, moving in a quick but orderly fashion.P The vast space was lit up by floodlights, all pointing towards a
huge structure in the middle of the cavern.

Brad stared up, and up, with an astounded look on his face.

Marquis and his people smiled with excitement.P Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the Moonsword.

A giant rocket stood in the middle of the cavern, resting on
a monstrous cradle of concrete and steel.P
It stood two hundred and fifty feet high, and was fifty feet wide at the
base, which was ringed by four small tailfins.P
A giant, gleaming silver cylinder, tapering to a blunt nose at the top,
with no logo or insignia on its fuselage.P
It looked like a giant, gleaming cannon shell ready to be fired at its
unsuspecting target.

Long steel arms stretched out from the launch tower,
carrying electrical cables, hoses, and data links that connected to the body of
the Moonsword.P Wisps of vapor
drifted from various locations along the length of the rocket, as valves vented
pressure from the super-cold fuel inside its mammoth tanks.

Brad turned to Marquis with an enormous grin.P Okay, you may be an evil mastermind, and
youre gonna eighty-six the moon, and probably cause global destruction but
THAT is the coolest thing I have EVER seen in my life!P Your very own secret underground rocket
base!P This is awesome!!!P He calmed down a bit.P Uh, but its still evil, though.

While Brad gawked up at the Moonsword, a technician
with a walkie-talkie ran up to Maximillian Marquis, shouting to be heard over
the noise of the machinery and heavy equipment.P Everythings ready, just like you ordered, sir!P Were at five minutes and counting!P If youll step this way?

Marquis gestured for him to wait a moment, then turned back
to Brad.P I am glad to see that you are
as impressed with the Moonsword as I am, young man.P You know, it always amazes me that something
so massive can take to the skies.P The
power required to lift it is most impressive.

He motioned for Jenny to follow him, then he put an arm
around Brads shoulders and guided him towards the rocket.P With his walking-stick, he pointed towards
four huge rocket nozzles, hanging down from base of the Moonsword,
dangling over a giant concrete flame pit.P
Each one of these rocket engines generates over two million
pounds of thrust.P They produce an
amazing amount of heat and flame when they ignite; the flame trench is
necessary to keep the rocket from destroying itself with the blast from its own
engines.

Wow! whistled Brad, still a bit awestruck.P He laughed at Marquis.P Man, Id sure hate to be around when this
thing goes off

Marquis simply smiled back at him.

XJ-9, he commanded, take our bothersome young friend down
into the flame pit and secure him.P
I will meet you over by the elevator.

WHAT?!? shouted Brad.

Jenny grabbed a length of chain lying on a nearby
platform.P She took Brad by the collar,
and flew them both fifty feet down into the pit.P Brad couldnt believe what was happening.

Jenny!P Jen okay,
cmon Jen.P Snap out of it.P I mean youre just kidding around, right?P You know, if you destroy the moon, thats
really going to hurt your grade on your Career Week project.

Jenny marched him over to a steel pylon, jutting up from the
concrete, directly underneath one of the rocket nozzles.P She started to loop the chain around Brads
chest and waist, securing him to the pylon.

Brad started to get a little desperate.P All right, youre still mad about me
teasing you in the cafeteria yesterday.P
Thats fine!P Im sorry!P Now what do you say we get out of here, fly
back home, well go to Mezmers, Ill buy you a can of oil.P Doesnt that sound nice?

A pencil-thin laser beam shot from Jennys eyes, welding the
ends of the chain together.P She turned
to fly back up

Wait, wait, Jenny!P
Ah last request!P Im supposed
to get a last request, right?P Doesnt
the condemned man always get a last request?

Three minutes and counting, echoed a deep voice from an
unseen loudspeaker.

Jenny tilted her head, a bit confused.P Mister Marquis did not specify one way or
another.P What is your request?

Brad gave her a sad-puppy face.P I just wanted to give you a good-bye hug.

Jenny pondered that for a moment, and there might have been
a twinge of sadness in her eyes.P
O-okay.

Brad wrapped his arms around Jenny, and leaned his head
against her cheek.P Hey, check it out,
were both in formal wear heck of a place for our first date.P He patted her on the back, innocently
drifting his hands closer to the back of the neck.P His fingers fumbled around a bit, and found the clasp on the
mind-control necklace

Jenny jerked away, slapping his hand in the process.P A trick! she growled.P Youre just trying to get my diamonds.

Brad rubbed his sore hand, as Jenny flew up to ground level
to meet Marquis, Ruby, and Rojack.P
Marquis and Ruby had changed into silver-and-black flight suits, and
were just about ready to board the Moonsword.P Well done, XJ-9, grinned Marquis.

Ah hey, excuse me?!? shouted Brad, his voice cracking a
bit.P Look, tell you what, why dont I
just forget that I ever saw any of this, yknow, I promise to keep it all a
secret, you let me go, and I eh die of old age in eighty years or so?

Why, I thought youd be pleased.P You have the best seat in the house, for the story of the
century!P I imagine this will make quite
a Career Week presentation, wouldnt you agree?P Marquis laughed sarcastically.P
Farewell, Bradley.P Curiosity
kills more than just cats, it would appear.

They boarded a large steel-cage elevator.P Motors squealed to life, and the Marquis crew,
with several other humans and robots and Jenny quickly climbed hundreds of
feet into the air, to a steel walkway leading to the cockpit of the ship.P A deep rumble reverberated through the
cavern as the rooftop of the silo split in two, and its massive doors slowly
retracted.

Two minutes and counting, announced the loudspeaker.

Brad pulled at the chains securing him to the steel pylon,
but it was no use.P They were strong
enough to hold an elephant.P He tried
wriggling back and forth, hoping to squeeze free from their grip, but they were
too tight.P Right about now is
usually when Jenny flies in and saves my butt.P
Except that now shes working for the bad guys.

The massive rocket nozzles started to twist and gimbal back
and forth to warm up their hydraulics.P
Wisps of gas and vapor spat out of the huge nozzles, softly at first,
then with increasing force, enough to blow Brads hair into his face.P A low, dull whine emanated from the engines
as their turbo-pumps started to spin themselves up to speed, and grew in pitch
and volume.P The whole base of the
rocket started to vibrate ever so slightly.

Sixty seconds and counting.

Brad stared up at the gaping nozzle and gulped hard.P In sixty seconds, Im gonna be a crispy
critter.

Continued in Chapter
Ten

A/N I dunno, this storys getting a little long.P Maybe I should just stop it right there
wink